Gloom, Despair, and Agony on Me

Psalm 42:5 Why, my soul, are you downcast? Why so disturbed within me? Put your hope in God, for I will yet praise him, my Savior and my God. Many years ago, there was a show called "Hee Haw". Those of you who are younger, and perhaps those older readers who are more sophisticated than I will not remember this show. I certainly do. The humor was slaptstick, silly, and every member of the family could listen to it. One section of the show regarded the "woes" of the characters, and it was begun by a song that went something like this: "Gloom, despair, and agony on me Deep, dark depression, excessive misery If it weren't for bad luck, I'd have no luck at all Gloom, despair, and agony on me" This song was followed by a period where the characters told of their various personal " tragedies", always funny. In reality, however, experiencing life's difficult moments doesn't often end with a laugh. Reading the Psalms have led my thoughts to Christians who experience despair and depression. In an article on the 'Mental Health America'website,some startling statistics are given. According to this site, depression affects more than 21 million American children and adults annually and is the leading cause of disability in the United States for individuals ages 15 to 45. It is also the principal cause of the 30,000 suicides in the U.S. each year. In 2004, suicide was the 11th leading cause of death in the United States, third among individuals 15-24. I have struggled with depression all my life. I would be going through my regular routine, busy and feeling fine, when a fog would overtake me. I would be sad, hot-tempered, tired, and lonely even when surrounded by family and friends. There was no happiness and certainly no joy. I made more problems for myself than I solved during these times. Although I sometimes got medication,which truly helped, I was never really at peace during these episodes. I personally believe depression was felt in Bible days as well. Some of the laments we read indicate the writer was full of despair. When reading the Psalms, I detect the sadness and hopelessness the writers feel. In many of the chapters, the writer's despair can be easily observed. Psalm 88 is a good example.Although David wrote many of the Psalms, he was not the writer for all of them, and did not write this one. The first two verses in the beginning of this Psalm that have a positive feel to them, but are then followed by verses 3 and 4: 3 I am overwhelmed with troubles and my life draws near to death. 4 They treat me like those who descend into the grave. I am like a helpless man Sound familiar? It does to me. This Psalm is one expression of despair after another. The last verse says: You have taken from me friend and neighbor— darkness is my closest friend. The writer sounds pretty down, doesn't he? As I study the scripture, I use commentaries to look at varying intrepretations of what I am reading. I am amazed at how much time and study it must have taken to write an intrepretation of every passage of scripture in the whole Bible. One commentary I use is written by Matthew Henry. His book is 1,986 pages of analyzing scripture. Anyway, one of the comments he makes about Psalm 88 rang true with me. He says: " Thus greatly may good men be afflicted through the power of melancholy....." 'The power of melancholy'. Depression does have a great power over us. Before I go on, let me say this: Depression and anxiety, when felt habitually and over the course of time, are medical conditions. They require medical treatment. Much of the depression certain people feel is a physical, usually inherited, condition. Trying to 'push through' such depression is usually futile. Another thing we do is to suggest to ourselves that the depression is a spiritual condition, brought on by weak faith. This gives us deeper anxiety, as we feel we are failing our Savior by not believing enough to be relieved of these feelings. I continue taking medication for depression for a variety of reasons. I have to tell you, though, that taking medication was not a complete cure for me. I still experienced a level depression, self-loathing, and fear. What I am about to say, however, is the complete truth as I know it. Even with medication, I still experienced some symptoms of depression. I needed something more. I found that 'more' in my relationship with Christ. I did not find complete peace, even with medication, until I surrendered myself, my 'conditions', my feeling, my well-being, to the will of Christ. At that moment, I was released from the grip that depression had held on me for many, many years. Yes, I still take medication. I must. But my relationship with Jesus gives me a level of peace I could never find any other way. This is something I think David knew as well. In his Psalms, he would express his anguish, which seemed insurmountable at times,but so far in my study he usually came back with a declaration of praise. Let's look at Psalm 86 for example. At the beginning, David expresses his despair. He almost immediately goes into praise for God. He uses words such faithfulness, great love, deliverance, compassionate, gracious, slow to anger, mercy...the list goes on and on. Praise is definitely an answer to helping you climb out of the 'blues'. It never fails for me that when I am feeling somewhat down, if I remember to turn on the praise music and sing along, my mood is lifted and my day is completely turned around. Reading the Word does the same thing. The power of the Holy Spirit, WHEN WE CALL ON HIM, is amazing. He can pull us back, back into a spirit of thanksgiving, positive thoughts, and yes even happiness. Matthew Henry alludes to delayed or deferred deliverance. By this he means that sometimes, for His reasons, God delays our deliverance from anxiety or depression. He says, "Sometimes those whom God designs for eminent service are prepared by exercises of this kind"(p.673). Again,this is a lesson we have to learn over and over. Sometimes God allows things in our lives because He has a higher purpose in mind. Sometimes, if we're lucky, we can see later how God used our suffering to accomplish good in our lives or the lives of others. Sometimes we are never sure of why. But we can certainly be sure of this: there is help,there is hope. We, as Christians, have more help at our disposal than the world does. Not only do we have medicine to rely on, which is important, but we have the power of the Most High to complete the process to restoration. I KNOW this to be true. Even with lifelong depression issues, He is there to comfort. He makes it better than it ever was before. I can handle my issues so much easier with His help. How much more help can He be for the smaller, day to day disappointments and failures we have? This morning I saw something on Facebook that really applies here. Here it is:

Gloom, despair, and agony can be lessened or avoided. There is ALWAYS hope in Christ. He can lift away the gloom, wipe away despair, and tend to our agony. We just have to relinquish ourselves to Him. And in doing so, what we find is always miraculous!