Christmas...Without the Merry


"I have told you these things so that in me you may have peace.  In this world you will have trouble.  But take heart!  I have overcome the world!"
-John 16:33

"So do not fear, for I am with you; do not be dismayed for I am your God.  I will strengthen you and help you; I will uphold you with my righteous right hand."
-Isaiah 41:10



When we think of Christmas, we think of a lot of things.  As Christians, of course we think about the miraculous event that gave us all a chance for eternal life.  The blessed baby who lived and died for us.  But honestly, there are a ton more things we think about at Christmas too.  Family, friends, gifts, parties, a long "to-do" list....and on and on and on.

Because of our dependence on media, we see a lot of the "perfect Christmas" stuff saturating our feeds or televisions.  The girl finds her true love right at Christmas.  A happy family gets together, sporting warm Christmas jammies, by a fire and a tree with many presents under it. Love, unity, and peace everywhere.  I wish.

We begin to compare our imperfect lives with the perfect ones we see on media.  Watching a "happily ever after" Hallmark Christmas movie is hard if you are experiencing divorce or breakup from a significant other.  Siblings opening presents happily in the living room is great to see, unless there is a fracture in your family and some siblings are not speaking to others.    Tons of presents under a tree look amazing, unless I am the mom who barely gets by, and Christmas will be sparse for my family this year. A large crowd of happy faces is appealing, unless you will be alone this Christmas.  Toasts to a wonderful new year are great, unless a doctor's diagnosis makes next year scary and uncertain. And the loss of a valued family member makes  Christmas activities bittersweet at best. It's very hard not to compare our lives to the picture perfect ones we see portrayed.

Teddy Roosevelt once said:
                        "Comparison is the thief of joy."

Truth.  It's hard to remain joyful when my life looks pathetic or tragic in comparison to others I see around me.  Facebook is notorious for this.  People don't usually show us the negative aspects of their lives....the heartbreaking, raw parts that keep us up at night.  Nope.  We show the world our best, sometimes even making things appear much better than they really are.  Admit it.  When you see all those happy pictures, does it makes you a little sad if your life doesn't seem to live up to that?

Then there's loneliness.  Loneliness is pervasive in our society today.  We are more socially isolated than ever before, as we hide behind a computer screen.  We all have too much screen time...some more than others.....and interacting with a screen seems to be much easier than a personal interaction.  Well it is.   All you have to do is sit in your recliner, put the laptop on your lap, and start clicking.  Easy.  It's a little harder to get in the car and go visit a friend.  Or call someone on the phone and just chat.  Or walk next door and give a neighbor a hand with a project.

There are lots of interesting statistics about loneliness .  A study was done in the UK, and they found that 1/5 of the population stated they were lonely, at least part of the time.  I would have thoght that might be higher.  But here's the surprising thing they found....millenials were as likely as seniors to be lonely.  One would think that because they are young, and still with family and in the workplace that they would not be as lonely as the older adults who have experienced changes in family structure, retirement, and health challenges.  I wonder if their loneliness stems from isolation , even self-inflicted isolation.???

With the loneliness some of us feel, there's often anxiety as well.  Worry, tense muscles, anticipation.
Never feeling calm or right.  If I am not living up to an expectation, real or imagined, I am going to be anxious.  The problem is, those expectations are impossible to attain.

I struggle with both of these things.  I can be lonely in a crowded room,and anxiety can be my best friend. I can honestly say I have tried almost everything to self-medicate.  And, again, with honesty, I can say only one thing has worked.  I have to plug in to the One true source for contentment.  Do I do this consistently and always effectively?  No, I don't.  But consistently, and always effectively, He is here when I finally go to Him.

This Christmas, let's remember a few things.  Not everyone feels merry and bright.  Many are dealing with heartaches that will never be "fixed".  Instead of showing the world how much we have in our lives to be thankful for, such as family and gifts, lets point instead to the only Gift that matters this season.  Let's let Him shine, and when we do that everything else brightens as well.

Merry Christmas!  Thank you God for this amazing Gift that shines all year long.

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